Never taking one single breath for granted.... enjoying the journey one day at a time!

Friday, May 28, 2010


Daxton graduated his final year of preschool I cant believe he will start Kindergarten next year. He is growing up so quick and is such a smart boy. Hes doing really well at writing his name, knows his colors, numbers and letters. He really enjoyed preschool. Stefon graduated his first year of preschool. He is very smart as well and enjoyed his first year in. I know I'm crazy but I send my kids to preschool for 2 years. I love seeing how much they learn and grow!! They had a fun graduation got lots of fun things and got to play at Nickelcade. Layne and I gave each of the boys balloons and cars from toy story 3 as their present. (It was so sweet the next day they sent them to heaven for their baby Kael) My mom also came and gave them puzzles, coloring books and crayons plus all their stuff the teachers gave them. Daxton and Stefon gave each of their teachers a bouquet of roses to thank them for their hard work this year. What a fun year at preschool cant wait to see what next year brings!!

Monday, May 24, 2010

Daxton turned 5!!!

Holy cow I cant believe I have a 5 year old. Daxton is such a good boy!! He is so tender hearted, loving, kind, smart overall a great kid!! Daxton is getting ready for Kindergarten he and I went to the orientation and then on Friday we went and got his shots (he was so brave) and had his well check where he passed the exams with flying colors. Hes 32 lbs which is 10% for his age, 34 inches which is also 10% for his age. On the smaller end of the scale but he has lots in him for being so little. Daxton is a great helper and a great big brother. He will graduate Preschool tomorrow. So crazy!! Daxton decided for this birthday party he wanted to go to Jungle Gyms. It was a blast he had 20 kids show up and lots of family!! What a great time and he got so many great presents. Then on his birthday we did his traditional date day. We went to lunch at Wingers (his request), went to Nickelcade and spent about 2 1/2 hours there playing games and earning tickets (he was so sweet wanted to use his tickets to buy Stefon a prize) then we went to the movies Diaries of a whimpy kid which he loved and then his request was to go to the library to check out 5 books since hes now 5. After that we went over to Grandma R's for dinner and a cake that they had made which was a wrestling cake one of Daxtons favorites!! Overall a very fun birthday week for Dax! Happy Birthday Daxton. Mommy is so proud of you and loves you so much!! Thanks for picking me to be your mommy!!

Landons 9 months

WOW!! I know this is a little late but I wanted to wait to post until we went to Landons 9 month well visit. On the 12th of this month Landon turned 9 months old. I cant believe its been that long already. Seems just yesterday he was born. He is such a smart little boy!! He says 7 words (mama, dada, brother, more, hi, bye bye, ba ba) That is very advanced for a kid his age!! He loves to sit up and play toys and loves the jumparoo!! I need to schedule his pics but things have been so busy! I promise ill get it done! Landon is very skinny hes only 15 lbs 15 oz. only 5% for his age. Hes 28 inches long which is 45% and his head is 25% which is small compared to my other kids! I am so grateful for Landon. He is such a special little boy and he makes me smile! I am grateful we got the chance with another little boy!! His brothers love him and he loves them!! He is such an amazing little boy!! I am grateful for every day we have together!! Happy belated 9 months buddy!! Mommy loves you to the moon and back!!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Live Laugh Breathe Event

Hi fellow bloggers.... If you notice on the side of my tool bar I have a link to an amazing event. I have been following this little girls moms blog for months now and feel so strongly about her event. This sweet little Kenzie passed away at just shy of 5 months from a neuromuscular condition called SMARD. She was amazing!! She is the most beautiful little girl and I love her parents to pieces even though I have never met them. I feel close to them and their situation since Kael passed away from a neuromuscular condition it hits close to home for me. If any of you are interested in helping out or attending you can get all the information from the blog on my toolbar. Thanks for everything and your support. I know her parents would be so grateful!! Here is a picture of sweet Kenzie.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Mothers Day and my Birthday!!

Wow May is half way over its so hard to believe!! Mothers Day was good and hard all at the same time. My sweet hubby got me Beautiful pink roses , a worlds best mom tee shirt, a waterfall, some scentsy scents and a beautiful card from him and one from the boys. The kids made these cute cards at school and painted a thing to put in the garden. It was bitter sweet of course with one of my sweet boys missing. It is great though to see the boys progress learning to write their names and draw pictures. Mothers Day was also tuff because Stefon had just gotten his tonsils out so he was sore and cranky!! We spent most of the day at home but did go to my in laws for a while for dinner. I didn't make it to the cemetery like I wanted to but plan to go this week. My birthday was yesterday it was a great day. Spent the morning playing with the kids. Then my mom picked them up for a overnighter. My sister took me to get my nails done and my eyebrows waxed when we got home my hubby had planned a surprise party for me. It was so fun to have my friends and some family there!! What a sweet guy. He even made a great dinner with the BBQ. I love BBQ!! Getting older every day I am but it was awesome to be surrounded by the people I love!! I am so grateful for the people in my life especially my kids and my hubby! They mean the world to me!! Dumb me forgot to take pics at the party but I think my sis took a few. Ill have to get them from her!! All in all the last week has been pretty good!!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Happy Birthday Layne!!!

Today is my hubby's birthday! I am so grateful for him. He is my rock!! He makes me happy when I am sad. Hugs me when I'm crying, is a great dad to my kids and works hard for us!! I truly owe a lot to him!!! I would be lost with out him. He held me up when we lost our sweet baby and is still here for me to this day!! Thanks babe for everything! You make my life great!! I love you so much and hope you have a great birthday!!!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Mothers Day....

Sweet Landon 6 months
At Raging Water with the boys in the summer

Me and Kael at Primary Childrens

beautiful waterfall picture

Another beautiful picture.

So Mothers day is quickly approaching. Last year at this time I was a total mess all week.. I cried alot and did not want Mothers Day to come. This year isn't much different. I haven't cried as much but thinking of the day stresses me out and makes me sad. I know I am a mother and I have 3 beautiful boys still here on earth with me but I just don't feel like a complete mother with out my sweet Kael. I miss him so much and wonder what I could have done differently. I often feel guilty wondering what I did wrong so that he couldn't be here on earth with us... Trying to process it all still hangs heavy on my heart. I do know that because of the loss of Kael I cherish every single moment I have with Daxton, Stefon and Landon and my hubby Layne. You never know what life will bring and we cant take even 1 single day for granted. I am grateful for that lesson but don't understand why I had to loose 1 to learn it. This probably all sounds crazy but its what runs through my mind some days. I will do my best to be happy as can be for my sweet boys still on earth with me this mothers day and hope and pray that Kael knows how much his mommy loves him!! To all you sweet mothers out there baby loss or not I hope you have a great Mothers Day and that you feel appreciated for all the hard work we as Mothers do!! Thanks for all the support and love you give me! P.S. thanks for the beautiful waterfall picutres from a fellow baby loss mama by the name of Lisa you can view her blog at waterfallangels.blogspot.com . They mean the world to me!!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Today is International Babylost Mother's Day

What a bummer to be in such a club... I am however so grateful to the people I have met through this blogging world. I hate that we know each other this way but am so grateful to have people that relate. It makes me feel not so crazy when I go through my hard moments and ok to that I have easier moments to. Sending much love to all my friends and fellow baby loss mamma's. Sending lots of love to my baby up in heaven!! I love you buddy and miss you more than I can tell you. Thinking of you always but much today!! Thanks for choosing me and teaching me all you did! I love you buddy. I hope you have a great day dancing in heaven with you other baby angel friends!! Love always mommy!!

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