What should have been....

A few weeks ago I was at the park with the kids. We were having a picnic lunch when another family came and sat fairly close to us. I glance over and noticed the I kids were about the same age as ours. The difference being they had 5.... they had 1 where there is a missing hole in my heart. Soon after another mom joined this mom and they started chatting away. I couldn't help but over hear the mom talking about how hard it was that she has these 5 kids. How she's always so overwhelmed and never has enough time in her day. How she is constantly loosing her patience and just wishes she could have a break. Hearing these words stings. I wanted to shout over to her hey it could be worse not all moms get to keep all their children and some moms would give the world to have what you have so please don't complain. Now don't get me wrong I get it that no need to vent sometimes and of course everyone needs a break here and there but sometimes I just wish people could be thankful do what they have. I so wish that people knew exactly how lucky they are to have all their kids and to be raising them. I know life is rough but it could always be worse. I watched these 5 kids play together just imagining what it'd be like if Kael were still here. What chaos it would be but how wonderful that chaos would be and how welcomed it would be.  It made me sit back and really think what's really important and to never forget be thankful for what you have. Dreaming of what that would  be like is all that I have for now but oh what I'd   give to have it be my reality. Our lives would be so different. Always missing one piece, so little yet so fierce a part of my heart that one day I pray I will get to be with again. Until that day always loving and missing you Kael!!