July 24th....

Im pretty sure I may have blogged about this before but its so present in my mind right now I have to write. In Utah July 24th its a state holiday. We celebrate the pioneers, we celebrate Utah. There are lots of parades, fireworks events. For me though this date is something so much different now. Its the first day that 5 years ago we got to bring Kael home. I never thought the day would come... We brought him home with lots of things like monitors, oxygen, suctions, medications and a g tube but we were so excited we didn't care. We were bringing our sweet baby home. We would all be together under one roof. The boys were so excited, we were so excited it was such an amazing feeling. Everyone would ask us if we were nervous to bring Kael home but we weren't. We had learned so much, knew what to pretty much expect and we knew how to run his machines. We were prepared to do anything and everything for him that we could. We never could expect that his home time with us would be so short. We had big plans and we were going to do anything to give this little guy the world. Sitting here today I still cant believe that its been 5..... yes I said 5 years. This 5 year milestone thing is  really sending me for a trip. It just seems so significant in my book. Ill always cherish that time we had at home with our sweet little angel. Ill never forget that feeling walking outside of those doors to take him home. I keep trying to live in a way that one day we will make it back to our sweet guy. We took a picnic lunch to the cemetery today and ate with Kael. It was a nice way to spend some time remembering and talking to him. I sure hope he feels all the love that we have for him. His example and love to us is surely a amazing thing!! I love you to the moon and back sweet boy!! Catch our hugs and kisses. Love always mommy!